by Stop Mike Lupica on November 19 at 7:55PM
I'm pissed today. Here's a laundry of things that have happened to me over the past 48 hours:
The Bible contains as many as 20 unfavorable references to the left hand, and over 100 favorable references to the right hand. Examples: "The right hand of the lord doeth valiantly, the right hand of the lord is exalted" (Psalm 118 vv15,16)
Well, screw that. Polar Bears and Gorillas are both left-handed animals, or so scientist believe. So are alcoholics. Lefties are three times more likely to be alcoholics as righties. But they are also twice as likely to be in Mensa.
Well, here are some more great lefties in Human (and NBA) History:
The first man was apparently left-handed:
Being a lefty driver means I never struggle to pay the tolls. I always laugh when I pass a coin tollbooth (I'm looking at you, Jersey Turnpike), and there are like $5 worth of coins on the floor from missed attempts to hit the toll. Suck on it, righties.
But being left-handed in basketball isn't always an advantage. The bias against you might leave you out of the Hall of Fame, even though you averaged 30 ppg in four straight seasons:
It's a travesty that Adrian Dantley is not in the Hall of Fame.
The one basketball player that makes all white people the happiest also make lefties happy:
Hmm, odd. Looks to you like he's shooting right-handed, right? That's because he is. He was a natural lefty who had to play right-handed because the NBA wouldn't allow lefties in.
But then they changed the rules, and Nick the Quick came into the league. He was a lefty:
I shake phonies, man. You can't get next to a genuine article. I do not sing, though. I sling, though. If anything, I bling, yo.
Starr like Ringo:
Mr. Starr is also left-handed.
Check out the first item on this page... it's a Treatise from Ben Franklin on this subject.
Finally, getting back to the NBA... the greatest winner in league history:
The folks in Boston sure do a lot of success to the lefties in their history. So do Knick fans, too. Our greatest winner was also a lefty:
Without lefties, you can't win a championship. It's a proven fact, folks!
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- The GF asks me to open four cans of beans (apparently in preparation for the big Fart-Off at SML's), and hands me a beat up, old school can opener. One of those hand crank operated ones. Of course it is made for righties, and so it takes me a boatload of unnecessary effort to open these cans, and my right wrist feels like the Carpet Tunnel today.
- My new guitar teacher (yeah, I got one of those now - I'm trying to get back my old skills) goes into a diatribe about how he doesn't think there is any reason to play the guitar left-handed, and how if it was up to him everyone would play right-handed, because there is no reason to play left-handed. Um, how about because I was born left-handed? Is that good reason?
- Merriam-Webster's word of the day:
manque \mahng-KAY (the “ng†is not pronounced, but the preceding
vowel is nasalized)\ adjective
: short of or frustrated in the fulfillment of one's
aspirations or talents -- used postpositively
Example
sentence:
Clarke has a remarkable gift for drawing, but unless he applies himself, he'll always be an artist manque.
So the following words are anti-lefty: Gawk, Awkward, and Manque. Not to mention "Sinister", which comes from the Latin for... "left-handed".Clarke has a remarkable gift for drawing, but unless he applies himself, he'll always be an artist manque.
Did
you know?
The etymology of "manque" is likely to vex left-handers. English speakers picked up "manque" directly from French more than two centuries ago, and it ultimately comes from Latin "manco" meaning "having a crippled hand." But in between the Latin and French portions of this word's history came the Italian word "manco" which means both "lacking" and "left-handed." Lefties may be further displeased to learn that "manque" isn't the only English word with a history that links left-handedness with something undesirable. For example, the word "awkward" comes from "awke", a Middle English word meaning both "turned the wrong way" and "left-handed." And the noun "gawk" ("a clumsy stupid person") probably comes from "gawk"; that means "left-handed" in English dialect.
The etymology of "manque" is likely to vex left-handers. English speakers picked up "manque" directly from French more than two centuries ago, and it ultimately comes from Latin "manco" meaning "having a crippled hand." But in between the Latin and French portions of this word's history came the Italian word "manco" which means both "lacking" and "left-handed." Lefties may be further displeased to learn that "manque" isn't the only English word with a history that links left-handedness with something undesirable. For example, the word "awkward" comes from "awke", a Middle English word meaning both "turned the wrong way" and "left-handed." And the noun "gawk" ("a clumsy stupid person") probably comes from "gawk"; that means "left-handed" in English dialect.
The Bible contains as many as 20 unfavorable references to the left hand, and over 100 favorable references to the right hand. Examples: "The right hand of the lord doeth valiantly, the right hand of the lord is exalted" (Psalm 118 vv15,16)
Well, screw that. Polar Bears and Gorillas are both left-handed animals, or so scientist believe. So are alcoholics. Lefties are three times more likely to be alcoholics as righties. But they are also twice as likely to be in Mensa.
Well, here are some more great lefties in Human (and NBA) History:
The first man was apparently left-handed:
Being a lefty driver means I never struggle to pay the tolls. I always laugh when I pass a coin tollbooth (I'm looking at you, Jersey Turnpike), and there are like $5 worth of coins on the floor from missed attempts to hit the toll. Suck on it, righties.But being left-handed in basketball isn't always an advantage. The bias against you might leave you out of the Hall of Fame, even though you averaged 30 ppg in four straight seasons:
It's a travesty that Adrian Dantley is not in the Hall of Fame.The one basketball player that makes all white people the happiest also make lefties happy:
Hmm, odd. Looks to you like he's shooting right-handed, right? That's because he is. He was a natural lefty who had to play right-handed because the NBA wouldn't allow lefties in. But then they changed the rules, and Nick the Quick came into the league. He was a lefty:
I shake phonies, man. You can't get next to a genuine article. I do not sing, though. I sling, though. If anything, I bling, yo.Starr like Ringo:
Mr. Starr is also left-handed. Check out the first item on this page... it's a Treatise from Ben Franklin on this subject.
Finally, getting back to the NBA... the greatest winner in league history:
The folks in Boston sure do a lot of success to the lefties in their history. So do Knick fans, too. Our greatest winner was also a lefty:Without lefties, you can't win a championship. It's a proven fact, folks!Leave a comment
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4 Comments
Comments
Good stuff, but I hate to break this to you about the "first man" picture. The older guy in the picture would in theory be the "first man"...and he is a righty! Zinga
That "older guy" is God, dawg, who is not a man, even though for purposes of art he looks like one.
Graphic Forums
said
Great article. Thanks.
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v439/KonijnEiland/leftorium.jpg