According to Peter Vecsey, former NBA "star" Reggie Theus has become the favorite to take over as the Sacramento Kings head coach. "Sacramento", for those of you who haven't heard of it, is a small cowtown located somewhere in the stretch of the west coast between San Francisco and Seattle. Home to such notables as Mike Bibby and detective John Kimble, Sacramento is the perfect minor-league town for a new coach to begin his training in*.
Bibby:
Detective John Kimble:
Side note on Detective John Kimble: check out Prank Calling My Friends Using The "Arnold Schwarzenegger Soundboard" Computer Program.
Reggie Theus is currently the coach of the New Mexico State University Aggies basketball team. He has coached them since 2005. Wait, there's a new Mexico? Anyway, prior to that his last head coach gig was leading the Deering Tornadoes of Indiana:
He had a successful season there. The Deering team was lead by point guard Julie Connor and power forward Anthony "Sh*t, is he in every movie?" Anderson, a.k.a. "that guy from Kangaroo Jack", "that guy from the DMX/Jet Li movies", "that guy from Barbershop", "that guy from the Scary Movie series", "that guy who played Jim Carey's son in Me, Myself, and Irene", and "that guy from that scene at the drive-through in Harold & Kumar Go To White Castle", but he is not known as "that guy from King's Ransom", as no one has ever seen King's Ransom.
Believe it or not, that show was big in Estonia. It was shown on Kanal 2. Reggie Theus is worshipped as the Michael Jordan of Tallinn. Unfortunately there are no NBA players from Estonia. On the other hand there is one notable Latvian - Andris Biedrins. Look for him to force a trade to Sacramento promptly.
Um, one last thing... this is the first image that Google returns when you search for "Reggie Theus"... as if I didn't have enough shirtless NBA players on my website already:
*In case it isn't totally obvious, noted Laker fan and Los Angeles-raised DJM contributed to this piece. Also, I had no idea why he put a Fraggle Rock looking fellow for Bibby, so I asked him. "Because Bibby talks like a muppet" was his explanation. Judge for yourself:
Bibby interview:
Fraggles singing:
Leave a comment
|
7 Comments
Comments
Dude, where did you get that video of me singing karaoke with Chris Webber?
Classic, sir. Absolutely classic.
I'm not sure there are words in the English Dictionary to describe how awesome this post was. Julie Connor had a mean jumper
Back in the halcyon days of yore when the Lakers were-- how do I say this-- good, we would always yell "MIKE BIBBY!" in the most Fraggle of voices whenever he ran around Vlade's screen and sank that 18 foot jumper, which play they ran 14,000 times in a row (successfully every time! I love Derek Fisher forever, but he never once defended that play) which would have been massively frustrating if the Kings had ever, you know, actually won a series.
In conclusion: I'M A COP YOU IDIOT!
We love Reggie Theus! Also big in Estonia - pig!
And beatboxing!
http://www.metacafe.com/watch/314019/yolq4_da_best_in_estonia/
U Can't Touch This!
That guy is definitely Muppetesque. I don't really see that that's debatable.