Yo, we were curious about what our favorite Mets manager of all time, Bobby Valentine, was up to nowadays.  We admit that it would make us happy if the Mets would rehire Bobby, but that would probably fail.  It would be akin to the Wu-Tang Clan releasing a remake of C.R.E.A.M or something... it would just reek of despair. 

Anyway, Bobby V. has a blog on the internets, yo.   It's all about the his life in Japan.  It's great, too.  He post three paragraphs a day - a small intro, a small body (about three to four sentences) and a good-bye.  He even has the ill auto-signature on his posts!  So formal, Bobby.  It's a cultural thing... it's all business in Japan, even on the internets.

Bobby's apparently been busy opening subway stations, Mayor-style.   Mayor of Disneyworld-style.  Check the pic:

And Bobby's got beef, too:

"We also had a situation where Julio Zuleta was hit on the wrist at which time he was very angry. I went out to first base to see how he felt. And as I was coming off of the field, Buchanan-senshu, who has been very hot hitting homeruns and hit against us with every swing he takes, decided to yell and tell me to get off of the field. Later on, I went to their dugout and told him that he had no right to speak to me in any tone, considering that he has so little experience and I probably won more games at the Major League level than he had. I made it pretty clear that I didn’t appreciate his rude comments."

Stepping to Robert?  You'll find out about the Valentine's Day Massacre, Buchanan-senshu (Japanese for "Buchanan-beeyatch").  Yo son, respect mine!  ch-chick-pow!  Move from the gate now.

What else is up?  Bobby is dining with the starting rotation, yo (note: In Japan they have a six-man rotation, and pitch every sixth day; keep this in mind when Dice-K's arm falls off in August):

"Tonight I had the pleasure of having dinner with my 6 starting pitchers; Shimizu Nao, Watanabe Shunsuke, Ono Shingo, the young and very outstanding pitchers, Kubo and Naruse, as well as the real leader of our pitching staff, Kobayashi Hiroyuki. We had very fine food in downtown Tokyo. We had a great conversation as we had a couple of beers to relax everyone. If any of you have a chance of meeting any of the fabulous starting pitchers of the Chiba Lotte Marines, please do - they are all very good people and outstanding pitchers of the highest quality."

That's the third time in this blog I stumbled upon Bobby V. describing something as  "Fabulous".   Is he married?  Because I'm catching a certain vibe from Bobby.  A perma-bachelor vibe.  

Some things don't change, though:

"Naruse seemed to be getting tired after throwing 123 pitches; he threw only 70 pitches in the first 5 innings but it took him 63 to get the next 7 outs. But other than that, he had a great outing as he only gave up 3 hits."

Tired after just 123 pitches?!?  Bobby, that's not Al Leiter!  Bobby still hasn't figured out the Japanese word for "bullpen" yet.  It's "ブルペン〔牛の囲い場〕"

"Before the game, we had a great opening ceremony which was planned by our fabulous stadium staff. Morino-san and Takahashi-san did a great job of organizing the fans and the festivities."

Again with the "fabulous".  Just noting.

"We were behind the great young pitcher Darvish-toushu of the Nippon Ham; he had us 4 to nothing until we came back in the end.  Many fabulous things happened, including Imae having a wonderful at-bat leading off the inning, Tsuyoshi got a base hit in the infield, and Fukuura getting a walk with two outs, followed by a grand-slam by a newly acquired Julio Zuletta. There was a very powerful wind that was blowing straight in; it was a memento shot that rocked the stadium, which brought it a 4 to 4 tie."

We're now up to double-figures in the use of the word "fabulous".  I'm convinced Bobby has forgotten 80% of the adjectives in English.  "Darvish-toushu" is now my favorite pitcher in Japan - he's the Whirling Darvish, yo!  At least Bobby still remembers about the powerful winds.  "memento shot"?  This is a Memento shot:

All Hands To The Flag?  Interesting sh*t talk, Japan. 

I'll tell you what, I'm sure I'll be checking in on Bobby again before the season is over.

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