Parts 1, 2, and 3.

Last week, on Hoc-key Talk, I argued that Americans don't like hockey because it's a terrible sport to watch on television, thus implying, I guess, that Canadians like watching shitty TV? I don't know. SML then said some other stuff, and asked some questions, which I will endeavor to answer here. I'm sorry, I mean "endeavour." After all, I am an honorary Canadian. 

OK, firstly: last time, SML gave me "megaprops" (which is... good, right?) for dropping the term "mini-Mora" which he apparently took to mean that I was a tiny uprasegmental unit of length, smaller than or coincidental with a syllable, that is studied as a part of the stress pattern of language (thanks, Google!). Which would deserve props, except that I was actually referring to this guy:

Alors.

a) Do you agree or disagree that baseball is a dying sport, like hockey?  What about the international aspects of baseball – does that give baseball a chance, or diminish it, in the US?

When last we left off, SML asked me if I think that baseball, like hockey, is a dying sport. Well, I would guess so. Although I have a TERRIBLE record as a prognosticator. I thought John Kerry would win in a landslide, and I thought there was no way Children of Men would get left out of the Best Picture nominations. Instead we get these two pieces of crap.

That being said, yes, I think baseball is probably on the downward slide. Now I've gone and pissed myself off with that election map, and can't think straight. What I'm trying to say is: yeah, baseball sucks to watch live. The best parts about going to the baseball park have nothing to do with the game itself. I just can't get worked up with a 162 game schedule in which there's 30 seconds of downtime between every play. And a play might last all of half a second. Also, Babel sucks.

b) Will soccer ever take off in the US?

Absolutely. Tons of fun to watch on television, the ball is always moving (but is easy to keep track of), whenever somebody scores it's breathlessly exciting, and this country is so goddamn rich that eventually they'll bribe all the good players to come over here. It's bound to happen. This is the next big "it" sport; that would normally annoy me because it means that non-sports fans will be holding forth on how they don't like any sports except they love "the beautiful game" for its worldly class or whatever, but if it means that a soccer league with an entertaining product will last in America because rich people will pay for tickets, then I'll take the pedantry. That's the kind of guy I am.

c) Will paintball?  What the hell is ESPN thinking?

Hell no, and I have no idea. But recall, these are the same people who on purpose put this show on the air. 

 

d) What sports are better live than viewed on TV, and vice versa?

Better live: hockey, baseball, basketball seats I can't afford,

Better televised: the rest of them

Not a sport: NASCAR

e) What is the new hotness in music nowadays?

Baby, it's all about Margot and the Nuclear So and So's. They're good live and in recorded form.

 

Next topic! 

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